


Oh baby, you make my dick go DYNAMAX~

by Dragonfeathers



Series: That one dirty film they made about Leon has a lot to answer for [1]
Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon (Main Video Game Series), Pocket Monsters: Sword & Shield | Pokemon Sword & Shield Versions
Genre: Male Solo, Other, and enjoys it unironically, leon finds a terrible porn about him
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-29
Updated: 2019-11-29
Packaged: 2021-02-26 07:08:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,934
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21609577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dragonfeathers/pseuds/Dragonfeathers
Summary: While scrolling around looking for some new jerkoff material, Leon stumbles on a video... starring himself. It’s awful- shitty acting, terrible costumes, just rubbish.But it works.
Series: That one dirty film they made about Leon has a lot to answer for [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1563310
Comments: 20
Kudos: 146





	Oh baby, you make my dick go DYNAMAX~

Leon flopped down on his bed and pulled out his phone, scrolling mindlessly before sighing and flicking the screen off. He so wasn’t in the mood for social media. He felt frazzled, and full of pent up energy, and honestly, he just needed to get off. 

Sighing, he pulled up incognito mode and the Rotom in his phone shut its eyes and went to sleep. 

He searched up a porn site and went in search of something to get him going, palming at the front of his shorts absently as he scrolled through the pages of thumbnails. Ugh. There was so much shit on this site- he was after something basic, something with enough of a plot that it made sense, but not too focused on the plot that it took too long to get to the action- and he didn’t want any cringy shit either. Nothing where you felt like the characters were total morons who didn’t think anything fucking through before they did it. And he didn’t want any weird kinky shit or slapping each other around. Not too much to ask for, surely? 

But apparently it was- everything he clicked on just made him roll his eyes and click off after about five seconds, and when he tried to stick it out and see if it got better with one that seemed more promising, he found himself watching some girl take it up the ass with absolutely zero reaction for the entire video.

Surely a paid one would be better than this free shit- of course you get what you pay for- but even now he had money, he couldn’t shake off the feeling that spending it on wanking material was a bit of a waste when surely something free would do the job. 

He clicked back to the front page of the site. There were some cam girls, maybe that would be interesting- but they always took so bloody long about everything, reading out messages from their fans and thanking them for donations instead of just getting their fucking tits out already. 

What was trending- he’d avoided it because there was usually just a bunch of underage shit and really hardcore stuff he wasn’t into- but he was desperate.

And then he outright snorted as he saw what was #2 in Galar today- a paid short titled “Champion Leon gets his champion D on!” What the fuck- he had to see this.

He clicked on the thumbnail- a lookalike wearing a cheap version of his uniform and doing the charizard pose with eggplant emojis all around, and a massive pixelated area over his crotch- and tried to bite back the laughter as a very poorly-choreographed Pokémon battle commenced. 

At least the lookalike was jacked, he thought, even if the costume looked like shit- all cheap shiny polyester and was that fucking funky fur on his cape? But it was obvious that this was just a thinly cobbled-together excuse for some fucking, so he rolled with it, grinning as the lookalike swished his cape and posed and yelled instructions to his charizard- which was always conviniently off-screen in the shots of “Leon” - they’d totally just ripped shots from the last few premier matches, it was even fucking letterboxed where they’d cut off the logos and scores at the bottom. At least the challenger had real Pokémon on set, and they’d done their best to make it look slightly less shitty than they could have done. He snorted at her Pokémon choice though- the busty, pink-haired “trainer” had a miltank, a loppuny, and a fucking gardevoir- could they have been any more on-the-nose? 

The battle only lasted a few turns though- ‘Leon’ beat the challenger soundly and she fell to her knees, staring at the floor, as he swept across the battlefield to shake her hand.

It cut to a worm’s eye shot from her perspective and fuck- the lookalike had a bigger dick than him- it looked fucking enormous from this angle- or maybe they’d just stuffed his pants- but anyway, he grinned down at her and said some cheesy ass line about deserving a reward for such a good match.

And then it cut to them making out in the locker room- she pulled his hat off and threw it wherever and his fucking wig slipped- they hadn’t fixed it in the next shot either- he ground up against her and panted “oh baby, you’re so good, you’re making my dick go dynamax!”

“Forget dynamax, you’ve gone straight to gigantamax!” She moaned, grabbing for his junk, and Leon burst out laughing, wondering if he and Raihan were good enough friends that he could send it to him for a laugh. 

Then she was on her knees again, and she pulled him out of his shorts and went to town- his own dick ached at the thought of someone sucking him off, it’d been so long- the film may be bad, but the theatrical shots of her drooling and choking on the fake Leon’s cock sure got him going- and when he pulled her shirt down and thrust his dick against her cleavage he couldn’t help but moan. Then he finally had her- he ripped her clothes off and fucked her up against the lockers as she squealed and the camera focused on her breasts bouncing. He felt a little called out- that was one of his favourite positions- holding someone up as he fucked them always made him feel amazing, the strain only adding the the pleasure as he ploughed into them and he just felt so bloody powerful- 

Then it was over as they switched to a different position- he pushed her over a bench and spanked her for losing and Leon wasn’t really into it anymore- and fake Leon didn’t prep her enough before he fucked her ass so the actress cried before he pulled out and came on her face. Leon grimaced and left a thumbs down before he scrolled to the comments, unable to resist seeing what other people thought of the disaster of a porno. 

Surprisingly enough... everyone seemed to be into it. 

There were plenty of people dunking on the shitty costumes and battle, and of course there were the usual desperate comments about the actress’s tits, but also...

Leon’s face turned red as he read some of the more personal comments. 

“I wish Leon would fuck me like that. (Sweat emoji, thumbs up emoji, eyes emoji) 

“I bet Leon could lift me up like that no problem! (Heart eyes emoji)”

“I wanna beat Leon and put that gorgeous twink in his place! (Muscle arm emoji, eggplant emoji)”

“It’s a shame about the wig- they should have got a guy with real long hair. I wanna pull Leon’s hair and make him scream and then hop on his big dick and ride him til he passes out! (Sweat emoji, horse emoji)

(Ten eggplant emojis) LEON CAN HAVE MY ASS X 50! (peach emojis and eggplant emojis sporadically mixed together)

“Damn Leon ur Bobbies!”

“They should have had her pay attention to his nipples lol you can always see them through his shirt”

“Omfg this is everything I needed! Leon always wears such tight shorts I just wanna eat him up!” (Eggplant emojis)

(Someone left a reply with just peach emojis, and then someone replied to that with feet emojis.) 

Well damn. Leon kept scrolling, unable to stop- sure he got horny messages on his social media, but nothing like this. Of course, this kind of talk would get you banned on social media, but if it didn’t go straight to his dick.

He got up and grabbed his cape and hat from the chair, shrugging them on, before turning to look at himself in the full-length mirror, putting his hands on his hips and puffing out his chest with a grin.

He saw what everyone else saw- the champion of the Galar region, undefeated for three years straight, looking almost regal in his red cape- except they didn’t usually see his dick pressing against the front of his shorts.

And you could totally see his nipples through his shirt- he winked at his reflection in the mirror and gave one a pinch, an extra thrill zinging through him as he imagined doing this kind of thing on the pitch, with millions watching- well, he was giving the people what they wanted, after all. He palmed his dick with a groan, looking at his own face, which looked more than a little wrecked by now. He ran a hand up into his hair and pulled, knocking the hat off his head and bucking up into his hand, looking through lidded eyes and making a needy expression. Oh, damn- he bit his lip and gripped his junk more securely, pressing his fingers in to the underside of his dick and then moving to cup and roll his balls. 

Pulling harder at his own hair, he tilted his head to the side, imagining someone standing behind him, wrapping their arms around him and biting hickeys into his neck. His grip got firmer on his dick and he pressed further back towards his arsehole, debating whether to finger himself or whether going to get cleaned up was too much effort.

He decided against it, just tracing his fingers over himself and then back, sliding under his shorts and underwear to touch his sweaty skin. His free hand reached back and gripped his own arse- what he wanted to do to the other person he’d been imagining, but his own ass felt pretty damn good too. 

His dick ached in his hand- he wanted to be sucked off- he felt like he needed it- he imagined the girl from the film, on her knees in front of him, biting her lip and looking up at him with those big eyes. 

He pulled his cock out of his pants and spat on his hand before shutting his eyes and leaning against the mirror- his hand was a very poor substitute for a mouth but his imagination was running wild- remembering delicious suction around himself, someone licking into the slit at the top and then grazing him with their teeth- how Sonia always used to choke on him but keep going back down for more like the trooper she was until he came down her throat or on her chest- he leant his head against the cool mirror and groaned as he spilled over the edge, opening his eyes to see a very fucked-out champion in the mirror staring at him with wild eyes, messed up clothes and his hair stuck to his forehead. He shrugged off the cape and let it fall to the floor as he gave himself a couple more loving strokes, oversensitivity running all the way through him and making him shiver before he finally wiped his hand on his shorts and pulled the rest his clothes off. 

He used his shirt to give the mirror a wipe before he tossed it into the laundry basket, turning to give himself another approving look in the mirror. 

Even without the champion gear he looked pretty good, even if he said so himself. He didn’t usually make a point of looking at his own naked body, so he turned this way and that, trying to get a good look at his arse, his thighs, his back- before another stirring in his dick told him he was getting carried away again and he shook his head and went to go get showered. 

Maybe shitty porn had its place, after all.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope y’all enjoyed! Ngl I really like the scenario for this one and Leon is so fun to write~


End file.
